To use a dating app or site effectively, you actually have to engage with people
Of course, creating your profile is only half the battle. Someone’s profile can only tell you so much, and your goal is probably not to establish a relationship online – you therefore need to meet potential matches in real life. People are typically very meticulous, and it’s not uncommon for someone to spend thirty or forty minutes on a dating app and not engage with anyone in that time, but this is not the approach I’d recommend – you really need to engage with as many people as possible. This means being open to people who you are even remotely interested in and getting to the point where you’re actually meeting them in real life so you can really make your assessment.
Whether you meet someone in real life or online, authenticity is the name of the game. Baby boomers, Gen Xers and millennials are much quicker to lie in their profiles. But Gen Z is really all about authenticity and what I call embracing the quirk – in my opinion, it’s a much healthier way of going about things. The key is to stand out based on your individuality. You want to be utterly true to yourself, and you want to be so transparent in terms of who you are and what you believe that it might even push some people away.
This is why we’re beginning to dateasianwoman dating app see more people include political and social beliefs in their dating profiles
I realise that not everyone is good at talking about themselves or putting themselves forward and identifying what their virtues are, but you can get help from other people. Ask your friends and family to look at your profile and photos so that they can give you honest feedback. You can even hire a dating coach. And AI is being heavily integrated into dating apps right now, which can help you to create a narrative around your likes and interests. So you can definitely get assistance on this. But whether you do it yourself or you get some help, try to use online dating well; otherwise, you’re probably better off not using it all.
Tinder and the other apps that followed it soon proceeded to double down on the features that really worked, like photos. And as online dating has developed further over the years, it’s changed how we go about seeking a partner and what we’re looking for in a relationship. For example, Tinder doesn’t ask its users to designate things like ethnicity or education. It’s what we call frictionless dating, based around the belief that it’s to your advantage to meet people outside of your social circle. It’s back to those weak ties, right? You want to introduce new people into your social circle, because when you do, you’re not just introducing that person, you’re introducing their network too.
Then there is the time needed to maintain your profile and keep on top of your potential matches and messages. People work long hours, and they often use work devices which aren’t suitable for personal use. So even though apps have in some ways made the process of meeting people easier, some users still feel like they don’t have a lot of time to devote to it and accessibility can still be a challenge.
So Tinder’s position was that they wanted to open it up to everyone
Next, you need to complete your profile. And I mean really complete it, because online dating is a computer system, and the algorithms will favour you if you have filled out all of the questions and uploaded your photos. This is because the app wants to showcase people who look like they’re fully using and engaging with it. Then, when it comes to the content of your profile, you should stay away from saying all the things you don’t want. Talk about what you are interested in as opposed to what you are not interested in. This is a much better way of getting across your values. These tips might all seem very basic, but they are the keys to optimising your profile, and you’d be surprised, in my experience, how many people don’t do it.